It’s mid February on writing this — 7 degrees at 9 a.m but 65 degrees a day ago.
This has always been Kansas City’s way of winter — wild mood swings, tempestuous winds, ice storms. A golf day slid in now and then.
I am jello in my heart. Just straight up terrified. My son has a gun and we can’t find it. One girl who has seen it — who held it in her hand — described it as silver and brass and heavy. Heavy enough that it’s probably loaded, she says.
He’s at school now. He goes out at night sometimes and stays somewhere. Someone named “Jack” he says. We have no idea. The mother of the girl he is wrapped up is going crazy. She texts me through the night.
It’s not in his room. We looked. We’ve looked just about anywhere it could be stashed and around the house and no luck.
There was tell-tale mud on his shoes and wood chips on his sweatpants. I searched the yard for any signs of disturbance.
The world is a big place to hide things.
I have no words. But you most certainly do. Thank you for sharing, so bravely and honestly.. Just know that we hear you, and support you. Love.
omg, Zed. sending love to you now. so so difficult! I didn't know all this. want to talk? i'm here