Ode to a Woman's Body
I remember loving my body
I remember loving my body never. but perhaps i can count moments of affection: when I'm thinking nothing at all; during sleep; those times in my 20s a man worshipped it for a night; panting at the peak of a hike; under shower's blast; in shadow, on a walk; any time thunder rolls. I remember loving my body age 14, weight 105, size 6, seconds before hormones went riot, chin hair sprouting. i became heavy thick, taking up more space than allowed than I should, these hips have a mind of their own ramming objects miles from me. I remember loving my body into submission eat-drink my way out of pain not-eat not-drink myself out of pain and now I'm lost numbers continue to climb -- walk on walking I think I'll lay down. Is anyone else besides me tired? I used to like to bake. I thought I'd learn to cook. I've never liked to shop. My girls want to go to the mall: Is anyone else besides me tired?
...and then there was the Acne. A young fellow, unimpressively short, with uncontrollable volcanic activity that assaulted me morning and night standing at the sink in front of the mirror, trying to wash it away. How can I ever hope to find love?? Gratefully, the volcanos eventually went dormant and I found love, forty-eight years of it, a lifetime.
Oh yes yes yes to alll of that - ramming things miles from me